


Give Me Your Hand And I'll Hold It

by Patchouli (lifelesslyndsey)



Series: Brothers Grim [4]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Ben POV, Bonding, Boners, Bro talk, Embarrassment, M/M, Masturbation, Premature Ejaculation, Pseudo-Incest, Sex Talk, adoptive incest, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-17
Updated: 2019-03-17
Packaged: 2019-11-21 19:16:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18146324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lifelesslyndsey/pseuds/Patchouli
Summary: “We haven’t even...taken our clothes off.” He says all of this to his knees. His knees will not judge him.  Diego will probably not judge him. Ben usually doesn’t care if people judge him - he’s got ancient eldritch monsters for intestines. Sex is just...weird. It’s a weird thing that makes him feel weird, usually in a good way, sometimes not and he suspects this is a teenage hormone imbalance he’ll never grow out of. Great





	Give Me Your Hand And I'll Hold It

**Author's Note:**

> Diego and Ben have some bro-time and talk awkwardly about sex.  
> Ben is a little harder to write. I'm trying to get that physically sixteen vibe, while also maintaining a thirty-year soul. Like - Ben is aware that his body is fucking betraying him. 
> 
> Title from Birdy's People Help The People

Ben’s been dead...a while. There’s a specific number to the years, months, weeks, days, minutes, but Ben doesn’t know them and he doesn’t know how to ask so he doesn’t. He’s just been dead a _while_ .  He can see it in the lines of Klaus’ face, the way his body is very much a _man's_ body.  Ben feels old - Ben feels _thousands_ of years old, some days. Never when Klaus has his hands on him though, then he feels _exactly_ sixteen.  It’s good as much as it isn’t and he really doesn’t know what to do with that juxtaposition, except try not to embarrass himself but even that’s proven futile. It’s just his luck that Klaus seems to _like_ it.  Ben trusts that much - Klaus has been into some weird fucking shit over the years. So it’s not hard to believe he’d be into fucking his dead brother.

 

(And the crippling bout of premature ejaculation. Klaus seems to like that too.)

 

 _Christ_.

 

The byproduct of being dead, and having only Klaus for company for so very long is that...Ben isn’t so great at...being a person. Peopling, Klaus had called it. Ben does not excel at _Peopling_ .  He forgets to talk to the others, even when they can see him. He forgets that he doesn’t have to whisper everything into Klaus’ ear.  Even as only a ghost, he tried to be quiet for Klaus. Especially when other people were around. So sometimes Ben forgets that the others can see him, can hear him, can speak directly to him and he finds himself curling up over Klaus’ shoulder to press words into his ear.  Klaus will laugh, and the others will look - at Ben. And Ben will remember...he doesn’t need to speak through Klaus. But he’ll remember it too late, panic and _poof_ , Ben’s invisible again.

 

He’s not _shy_.  He just forgets. Sometimes, it’s just easier to stay invisible. Then he can’t forget he isn’t.  It’s...it’s not really fair to the others though. They miss Ben, and he misses them too, he does. It’s just...he forgets.

 

Diego though - Diego had told him that he didn’t need to be visible, and he seems to have really meant it because he always checks with Klaus.   _Ben around?_ Klaus will tip his head in whatever direction Ben might be - he’s always honest too, which is mildly shocking. Klaus is honest with the accuracy of weathermen.  But in this --- for Ben. Klaus is honest with Diego, for Ben.

 

Klaus, Allison, and a bemused Vanya are all sprawled out in one of the upstairs parlors having _girl_ time. Facials, and mani-pedis, and _sex_ talk which Ben can...physically not handle being around to hear. It turns his skin into a livewire, just thinking about sex. It’s horrendous and he hates it.   He knows about every sexual thing Klaus has done in the last ten years, doesn’t need the play-by-play and vehemently does not care to hear about his sisters doing...anything.  Sure...He...does things...with his brother. And Klaus _is_ his brother.  Not by blood, but by life. Life made them brothers. Death made them something else. Ben would like to think they wouldn’t do what they do if he was still alive but he’s not even sure that’s true. Not if the way Diego looks at Klaus is any indication.  Or Allison and Luther. Apparently, siblings just isn’t a deal breaker in this family.

 

The thing is...Even if Ben _hadn’t_ died...He can’t imagine letting anyone else put their hands on him.  Can’t imagine ever exposing himself like that, letting all his careful controls waver even the lightest.  He certainly never expected Klaus to be the one who could, never not once. But he’s hardly sorry.

 

He’d always thought it would be best if he was just alone. But then - he never had a chance to be alone. He had Klaus. And now, he can’t imagine not having Klaus. Klaus is absolutely a security blanket Ben will never give up. Klaus is safe.

 

Still. He doesn’t want to be around for their sex talk. He really, really hopes Klaus doesn’t talk about _him_ .  Can’t imagine there’s anything good, or especially compelling to say.  So far, Klaus has made him come in his pants on about eighteen different occasions. One time he managed to get his hands _in_ Ben’s pants. Over his boxer-briefs. And Ben lost it before _he even touched him._

 

Klaus had actually...He’d actually taken his hand right out of Ben’s pants and shoved it into his own, swearing through his teeth and coming about as fast as it took Ben to get hard again. And Klaus? Klaus had looked so ridiculously pleased to be standing there, with his hand in his pants around his soft, spent dick. Ben doesn’t get it, but he’s reaping the rewards of Klaus’ apparent lunacy, and so he won’t ask and he won’t complain.

 

He could just _go_ . Leave them be to do their thing, girl talk and the like. Blink back whenever like no time at all has passed. He could. But he doesn’t. He lets himself wander instead, out of the parlor and down the stairs. He can still feel Klaus like a comfortable tether. A leash. A collar. Most days, he can hold his own form, visible if not tangible, feeding off whatever makes Klaus..well... _Klaus_.  It’s a little harder to hold a corporeal form, but he thinks...he thinks that might come with time. Or perhaps just as Klaus grows into his gifts.

 

He drifts across the landing to the nearest open door and peeks in. It’s Diego, sitting cross-legged on the couch in front of the ancient TV.  Diego looks up, though Ben’s certain he hasn’t made any sound. He smiles, eyes crinkling at the corner. He looks...genuinely happy to see Ben. Ben fights to hold himself in place, even though it’s hard. It’s _hard_ , when they’re looking right at him. Any of them.  “Hey! Hey. It’s....” He laughs a little, and Ben almost backs right out of the room. “It’s good to see you.”

 

“Sorry.”

 

“No, no.  I don’t _need_ to see you,” Diego is quick to say, and Ben knows that because Diego talks to him all the time, whether he can see him or not. “It’s just nice is all. Klaus not around?”

 

Ben makes himself step fully into the room. “Girl time,” he says shortly because Diego is looking _right at him._ “They’re talking about sex,” he says accidentally because it’s on his mind. It’s always on his mind, since he kissed Klaus. It was on his mind before - it just hadn’t felt so...possible.

 

Diego makes a face, and shifts over on the couch - it’s an invitation. To join him. Ben hasn’t been alone with any of his siblings since he died. Not to their knowledge anyway.  “He probably won’t talk about you, to them. He knows you wouldn't like it.”

 

He makes himself sit down, makes himself sink into the cushions, instead of vanishing from existence as he’d much prefer because he doesn’t want to talk about how Diego knows what they do. Watches. “He would,” Ben says, very much awkward. He’s just glad his voice had mostly settled by sixteen. Mostly. “Like to talk about it, I think. He likes to talk.” _Brag_.

 

“Yeah,” Diego laughs again. He looks...well. He looks delighted to be talking to Ben and it’s just...it’s a lot. It’s nice though. He misses them too. “He does. Regardless of whether or not anyone is listening.”

 

“I’m always listening,” Ben shrugs.  He doesn’t think the others fully grasp how he’s been at Klaus’ side since the moment he died. _Haunting him_ .  How much of Klaus madness might have been Ben’s fault. How seeing his dead brother every single day might have been _hard_ .  Might have driven him to the deep end. Ben had tried to leave, really he did. But he never could. Not permanently. He always came back to Klaus.  And eventually, that became a comfort to both of them. _Eventually_. “He even talks in his sleep.”

 

“Do you need to talk about it?” Diego asks suddenly, shifting his body so he’s fully facing Ben, instead of the abandoned TV. “I know you talk to Klaus, but...might be hard to talk to Klaus about Klaus.”

 

“Klaus loves talking about Klaus.” Ben blinks at him, feels the color fade out at his fingertips and tells himself sternly _no_. Diego is talking to him. And Ben will remain where he is. “Um.”

 

Also...Ben kind of _does_ want to talk about Klaus.

 

Diego grins with all his teeth and it’s like looking at sixteen-year-old Diego all over again. Boyish and charming. “Yeah?” That’s the thing about Diego. In opposite to Klaus - Diego never pushes.

 

“ _Nooooo_ ,” Ben pulls his hood up over his head and yanks the drawstrings as hard as he can until he’s completely hidden. “But also...yes.”

 

“You really are shy,” Diego says, sounding very much amused. Ben sort of wants to hit him - brotherly affection - but he only hits Klaus and he’s not sure what touching Diego will actually do when he can barely look living-people in the eye. Touching one. Terrible idea.

 

“I’m _not_.” He sounds petulant and embarrassing even to his own ears and it’s enough to have him freeing himself from the ridiculous confines of his hood to stare at Diego. “I’m not! I’m just...And Klaus!”

 

The boyish grin goes hard, and Diego looks at him sharply. “He’s not making you do anything you don’t want too, right?”

 

Which! What! Ben’s sort of disappointed in Diego for even asking. It’s Klaus. And also, Ben’s _dead_. You can’t make him do anything. “He wouldn’t. You can’t honestly think he would? And even if he would, he can’t, physically. I can just...Leave.”

 

“I know that he can be persuasive,” Diego argues, very mildly. He’s not wrong. Klaus is charming like sociopaths are charming. There’s an aura to him that does not lend itself to trust, but a veritable rabbit hole of intrigue. It’s hard not to follow him, just to see what he’ll do next. He’s also very pretty. “He’s older, he probably has a subconscious expectation when it comes to sex. And I know when you’re sixteen...you don’t know what you want, so it’s easy to let someone else decide for you.”

 

He can feel himself blushing, can feel the hot rush of it in his cheeks which means he’s fully corporeal. “He’s...been very patient.”

 

Diego is still skeptical and Ben wishes that wasn’t a reasonable response. “ _Klaus_.”

 

“I don’t understand it either,” Ben gives in, throwing up a hand. It’s all very dramatic and teenager and he’s _thirty_ dammit, kind of.  Time is really weird when you’re dead. It’s been years, but also he _just_ died. “We haven’t even---” He stops, very suddenly, the whole of his body going hot and tingly. He can’t tell if he’s embarrassed (scratch that, he very much is). Or just--- _Just_.

 

The tension in Diego’s shoulders leaves, and then he’s just back to grinning. “We need some bro time?”

 

“To talk about our brother's sex life. Which is also my sex life.” Ben looks at him skeptically. “This family is really fucked up.”

 

“I like to think Dad’s rolling in his grave.” Reaching out, Diego pats Ben on the thigh and----

 

And Ben gets very, very bright. Just for a second. “ _Shit_ .”  Oh no. _Oh please no._

 

“That was weird,” Diego says because he doesn’t know that Ben now has a fucking boner. Because his brother touched his thigh. Not the brother that usually touches his thigh. A different one.

 

“It’s fine,” Ben says tightly, drawing his knees up to his chest and making himself as small as possible on a single couch cushion. “Do you think it’s weird?”

 

“You and Klaus? Absolutely. But I think there are worse things than weird.” He reaches out, tentatively this time, and curls his hand over the back of Ben’s neck and his hands are calloused and rough the way that Klaus’s really aren’t. It’s a brotherly touch - Ben remembers Diego doing it when he was alive. Diego pulls them a little closer and Ben goes, even though he’s so hard it fucking _hurts_ .  He thinks he might actually - he is _not_ going to come in his pants from this. He is not. “If it makes you happy...You deserve it, okay? Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about how you feel happy.”

 

He lets go of Ben and Ben breathes out hard. “We haven’t even...”

 

“Had sex?” Diego asks, very gently, and the word sex on his mouth makes Ben feel stupid and sixteen.  “That’s okay. If this was a normal relationship,” he tells Ben, very carefully and the R word sounds oddly large where it floats up between them. “You guys haven’t been together very long.”

 

“We’ve been together since Dad bought us.”

 

“It’s okay that you haven’t had sex,” Diego says, instead of arguing that. Ben forgot what it was like to have a brother. He’s always had Klaus, but...well. That’s different.

 

“We haven’t...done anything.” Which isn’t exactly true. They’ve done _things_.  Klaus likes kissing Ben until Ben can’t fucking stand it anymore. Klaus can kiss Ben for hours if given the chance. Ben can usually make it about...eight minutes.  He likes Klaus on top, body pressed over him, calling the shots. Diego wasn’t wrong; it is easier when someone else decides. Doesn’t mean Ben doesn’t want it though. Ben...Really, really does. “We haven’t even...taken our clothes off.” He says all of this to his knees. His knees will not judge him.  Diego will probably not judge him. Ben usually doesn’t care if people judge him - he’s got ancient eldritch monsters for intestines. Sex is just...weird. It’s a weird thing that makes him feel weird, usually in a good way, sometimes not and he suspects this is a teenage hormone imbalance he’ll never grow out of. Great

 

When Diego doesn’t say anything though, Ben _has_ to look at him. Just a little, up through his lashes. This just proves it - Ben thought it wa weird, that they hadn’t...anything.  Diego clearly agrees Diego looks bewildered. “At _all_?”

 

“We don’t usually make it that far,” Ben tells him, somewhat pained, into the sleeves of his hoodie. “ _I_ don’t usually make it that far.”

 

It takes Diego a second, Ben can see the gears working on his face. “Oh,” he says, and then again after a beat. “Oh! No - that’s normal. When it’s new. That’s totally normal.’

It doesn’t feel normal. It feels horrifying. Not tentacle monster horrifying, but could-the-ground-just-swallow-me-whole horrifying. “Nothing about this is normal.”

 

Diego laughs, but it’s kind. It’s brotherly. It makes Ben feel kind of stupid and young though. He’s just as much thirty as the rest of them! “It’s normal when you’re sixteen. When your body is sixteen,” he corrects very quickly.  

 

Which is probably true but doesn’t make Ben feel better. “Klaus body isn’t sixteen!”

 

“ _Klaus_ comes in his pants, too?” And...Diego sounds... _weird_ .  Which is fine. He feels weird. They’re _bonding_.

 

“Solidarity,” Ben mutters, darkly.  He wavers, in and out, furiously uncomfortable. He needs...Klaus. He needs to creep behind Klaus shoulder, in the shadows of his hood where it’s safe. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore. This was a mistake.”

 

“No no no,” Diego says in a rush, throwing himself forward. He collides with Ben, just as Ben stretches is legs out.And....And... _Oh no._ Then he’s just...on top of Ben. On the couch. This is...Fucking terrible, Ben thinks. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t--- Hey, hey. You came to me to talk about this, we talk----”  He can see it in Diego’s face, the second he becomes aware of Ben’s erection where it’s pressed between them.  “It’s normal,” he says, very quickly. “It---its--- W-w-we’re talking about sex. I use to get hard if I passed a suggestive _table leg_. We didn’t---We didn’t have people to talk to, when we were younger, but I bet if we did...I’d have been the same way. This is normal. Don’t go. Talk to me.”

 

Which would be easier if Diego wasn’t laying on him - on his dick - his whole body pressing Ben down.  He’s bulkier than Klaus and Ben doesn’t hate it. He should---he should go find Klaus. But the _feels-good_ part of his brain is sort of winning out over the _mortified_ part.

 

Ben grabs the front of his hood and pulls it down over his face. “Please get off me.”

 

“Do you promise to stay?” Diego has both his hands planted on either sides of Ben’s head, and they’re...they’re probably close enough to kiss. _Brother_ , Ben tells himself firmly. _Brother, brother, brother._  “I want to help.”

 

He should just go. He should just poof right out of existence for a little bit, if only so he can forget how conflicted he feels right now, desperate to leave but also to come. _Brother_ , he tells himself again. _Wrong brother!_ “If you don’t get off me,” Ben says, very evenly. Flatly. He was never embarrassed as a ghost. He wasn’t quite...disinterested. But he didn’t feel things like he does now, not quite. He thinks his brain might be overloaded, because he can barely breath, let alone think. Diego is on top of him. The same way that Klaus is often on top of him. His brain gets the difference. His body does not. “I’m going to come in my pants.”

“Oh,” Diego says, and Ben feels him ease up, very, very gently. “I---Sorry. I didn’t mean too---”

 

“This is why Klaus and I haven’t----” He shakes his head, and wraps both his arms around his face where he’s still sprawled on the couch.  His boner is probably very obvious, but he just...cannot think about that right now. “Shit.”

 

“You’re just a little sensitive,” Diego tells him, calmly. “It doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Some people like it.”

 

“Klaus----” And whoops, no. They’re here to talk about Ben. Not Klaus. “ _I_ don’t like it.”

 

Diego doesn’t touch him again, but Ben sort of thinks he wants too, as he watches Ben curl himself back up the couch and bring his knees to his chest. “I know it doesn’t make you feel better...but it is normal. It might be...It might be a little more intense for you, given that---”

 

“Moonlight as a dead person.” Ben stares at him. “Do you think...do you think if I stayed...physically here more often...”

 

Diego nods. “You said...that you don’t feel much, when you’re invisible. And nothing when you blink out entirely. So maybe...when you’re corporeal...your body just goes into overdrive.”

 

“It’s hard,” Ben says, and then blushes furiously. Diego, to his immense credit, does not laugh. Klaus would have. Klaus would have made a very easy pun, paired with a sleazy smile and maybe flashed some skin until Ben was squirming all over the place. But this is Diego. “I forget you can see me, sometimes. It’s been so long. And then one of you asks me a question directly and I panic and vanish. But I could...I could try harder.”

 

“You wanna go take care of that?” Diego asks, tilting his head to Ben’s mid-section. “Might help.”

 

Ben blinks at him. _“By myself?”_ Judging by Diego’s expression, that was not the right response.

 

“You mean you _don’t_ ?” Diego somehow looks even more bewildered at that. “Buddy, that’s probably like....eighty percent of your problem. I jerked off like five times a day when I was your age. Don’t you remember?”

“No,” Ben says honestly. “I think I usually just ignored it.” He had tried, a few times, but the way it felt....was too close to losing control.

“Christ--- _don’t do that_ ,” Diego, tells him very seriously. “It’s perfectly normal. Healthy. I mean - I still jerk off every day. Sometimes twice, if I’m particularly tense.”

 

Jesus Fuck, Ben thinks. He’s... _Wet_. He can feel a damp patch growing where his dick is pressed against his belly. “You think that would help,” he says, using everything he has to maintain some level of neutrality. . LIke he doesn’t care that Diego jerks off.  Sometimes twice. Every day. He’s probably jerked off today. With the same hands he put on Ben.

 

“Yeah, yes. Absolutely.” Diego nods very seriously. “Get yourself off a few times before you and Klaus...” He swallows. “It’ll clear your head, if nothing else.”

 

“Thank. You.” Ben says, very stiltedly. “I should...” He laughs, a little hysterical hiccup escaping him. This is fucking absurd. “Should I go do that?”

 

“If you and Klaus are going to---”Diego blinks, a little to himself and Ben gets distracted by his throat, the way it rolls when he swallows. “It couldn’t hurt.”

 

“I’ve never.”

 

“ _Legitimately_  never?” And there it is - not judgment, but incredulity and Ben wants the floor to eat him. “Not even when you were actually sixteen?”

 

“I wasn’t sure if I liked how it felt.” Ben looks away, staring shrewdly into the low burning fireplace. “I wasn’t really... We didn’t exactly get a sex talk.”

 

“No,” Diego concedes. “That’s part of the problem here, I think.”

 

“It felt good, but it also made me feel...out of control. So I thought...I probably shouldn’t.” Ben wasn’t even...he wasn’t even particularly sure it was normal when it first started happening, thirteen or so. He wasn’t sure it wasn’t something about the monsters.  Sometimes the things they did...they felt good. And it was always more frightening than the things that hurt. So when it started happening a lot - Ben had thought...It had to be them. He couldn’t control it, after all. It had to be them. “By the time I figured out what was going on...Well. I still thought it was probably for the best that I didn’t.”

 

“Benny,” Diego says, all small and hurt sounding. “I wish I hadn’t been such a dick as a teenager. I wish you could have talked to me. You never brought it up to Klaus?”

 

“I thought there was something wrong with me.” Some of the embarrassment  has burned away. Like - he’s already dug himself this deep and Diego hadn’t pointed and laughed. So. Maybe it’s safe. “I didn’t want him to worry. He was already...” Slipping off a deep end, by sixteen. Not drugs yet, but reckless behavior and a spiraling bout of depression and anxiety. Then Ben died. And it got worse. “You think it’ll help?”

 

“It won’t hurt.” He stops though, even as he said it. “Are you still worried about Them.”

 

“No. Mostly.” They were calmer now, with Klaus holding him in place on a plane of existence none of them fully understood. They liked Klaus. Too much, sometimes, Ben thought. “I don’t think so.” Already, he wasn’t sure.

 

Diego took pity on him. “Alright buddy, come on. I got an idea.”

 

“I don’t think this is a good idea,” Ben disagrees, having no clue as to what the idea actually was.

 

But Diego was having none of it. He grabs Ben’s hand into his own warm, dry palm and tugged at him. Not...not roughly. Not even insistently. “C’mon, Benny.”

 

_C’mon Benny, c’mon. Let me have it. Give it to me._

 

Now...Now was not a good time to be thinking about the things Klaus said while Ben was trying not to come. “Diego. This is a terrible idea.”

 

“Look - I usually jerk off in bed or in the shower,” Diego explains, tugging Ben to the bathroom. “So take a shower. Relax. And I’ll be right outside the door.”

 

Which...isn’t a great way for Ben to relax, honestly. “ _Why_?”

 

“If you feel like you’re losing control, or anything - I can get Klaus.” Diego shrugs, like it was nothing to play lookout for Eldritch monsters while your brother tries to jerk off for the first time, explicitly because he would like to eventually be able to touch his other brothers dick. _Totally normal._ “Klaus can control them, right?”

 

“They’re calmer, with Klaus.” Calmer was maybe...not the exact word. They watched Klaus like cats watch laser pointers.

 

Diego raises a single brow, tilting his head forward, leading Ben to the answers he wanted. “But you don't want Klaus here for this.”

 

It would get it over quicker, that was certain. “His presence is largely counter productive to what you’ve suggested I attempt.” Ben sighs. “He’ll put his hands on me and I’ll forget what I’m suppose to be doing, okay?”

 

“Okay. So...I’ll only call for him if you think you’re losing control.” Diego shoves him into the bathroom, crowds right up behind him as he reaches into the shower to turn the taps. “You won't have to worry that way.”

 

“What if you don’t hear me?” And okay, so maybe Ben has been worrying about it more than he thought. That or the brain to dick ratio is skewed again. Klaus would be proud.

“I’ll wait right outside the door,” Diego assures him.

 

“So I should just...” He looks into the shower, steam already beginning to build up around them. “Relax.”

 

“Enjoy it.” Diego cups his hand over the back of Ben’s neck again, and Ben enjoyed it a little too much to be honest. “It’s healthy, and normal and it will absolutely help. Stay in there as long as you need too. I’ll be right here.”

 

“It probably won’t take that long.”He was too keyed up already, too hot under the collar and cup of Diego’s hand. “Sorry.” He didn’t fully understand the compulsion in him to apologize, or even what he was apologizing for. Except, perhaps, for being sixteen. It was a lot to apologize for. Sixteen fucking sucked.

 

Diego shook him a little, firm but playful, where he still held Ben in place. “Normal,” he said again. “Shit, if you get off too fast, just go for round two. You’re young. I’m sure you got a few in you. I wasn’t doing anything important anyway.”

 

“Oh my God,” Ben wheezed, feeling his face turn to fire. His stomach jumped, as he hunched his shoulders. _“Shut up._ ”

 

“Right outside,” Diego rapt his fist against the door. “Do your thing. Take your time. Holler if you know...tentacles are trying to eat you.”

 

“This is an awful idea.” But Ben still unzips his sweater, pausing only when Diego forgets to leave. He hovers, hand over his belt buckle.

 

Diego turns sharply, and throws open the door. “Right. Yeah. I’ll be...Right outside.”

 

***

 

When he re-emerges however long later, weak kneed and dazed, Diego is still there. He gives Ben a once over, from where he’s leant against the wall. “All good?” Ben opens his mouth, finds words beyond him, and just sort of...stands there.  He feels very, very solid in the Real World, very corporeal, very tangible. The billowing cloud of steam that follows him from the bathroom smells like six gallons of jizz and Ben doesn’t have enough of anything left in him to feel the least bit sorry, embarrassed or ashamed. “Jeeze, Ben. You leave anything for Klaus?”

 

“No.” No...No definitely not. If Klaus so much as touches his dick, Ben will probably pop right out of existence indefinitely. “But that’s okay.”

 

Diego pulls the bathroom door closed behind Ben. “It is?”

 

“Yes,” Ben confirms, as he tries to figure out how to get one foot in front of the other. “I can’t come in my pants if I can’t come.”

“Solid science.” Diego slaps Ben on the back, and laughs. “But I don’t think Klaus is going to be happy. Please don’t tell him this was my idea. He won’t thank me.”

 

“He might,” Ben tells him, dazedly. He has no idea what way he’s walking down the hall. He’s come-drunk in a way he’s only ever seen on Klaus. He feels...gutted and stupid but very, very good. Diego has good ideas. Klaus will never believe it. “If I’m not distracted by my own dick, maybe I can finally focus on his.”

 

“Oh. _Oh_.” Diego pats his shoulder again, an awkward, stuttered beat. “Well. Um. Go get em’, buddy. Find me if you need a look-out.”

 

And that’s right. That’s...Ben would not have done this on his own. He would not have. Diego made this happen. “Thank you, Ben says, awkwardly. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe...maybe weird isn’t the worst thing you can be.”

 

“My life has never been weirder,” Diego agrees with a dimpled smile, as he leads Ben the right way. “But it’s never been better, either.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> they're all just so adorable.
> 
> Ben POV


End file.
